Great Fake Beer Names
By John on September 3, 2008 @ 7 PM (31 Comments)
Being a guy, I love movie quotes. I really love them. A lot. It’s a weakness (or maybe a strength?) for just about every guy I know – friends and I can have entire conversations where nothing but movie quotes are passed around – no actual other words are used. Entire conversations. Really.
The fun part of course is trying to figure out what movie your friend just quoted and returning another quote from the same movie, if possible, to subtly let them know you know what they know. You know?
Well I recently got involved in a Twitter exchange with some of our Atlanta beer peers (or the ATL as we call it in, um, Charlotte) over at Monday Night Brewery after they posted a link to one of the all time great beer names: I’ll Have What the Gentleman on the Floor is Having Barley Wine (from the fine folks at McGuire’s Irish Pub in Florida). Well, the lads over at Monday Night Brewery are actually starting a brewery, so after that post they noted that they’re “tempted to rename all of our beer names ridiculously long sentences.” With that, the fun began.
I started out with a recommendation for “The Road Less Traveled And That Made All The Difference Pale Ale” and quickly realized what it was lacking: movie quotes. So we started a fun exchange of ideas that traveled along the lines of:
- What About That Time I Found You Naked With That Bowl of Jell-O Lager (from Real Genius)
- I’m Kind of a Big Deal Stout (from Anchorman)
- Roads? Where We’re Going We Don’t Need Roads Tripel (from Back to the Future)
- We Can’t Stop Here. This is Bat Country Hefeweizen (from Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas)
- I Hope You Have a Big Trunk Because I’m Puttin’ My Bike In It Doppelbock (from 40 Year Old Virgin)
- Warm Glass of Shut the Hell Up Barley Wine (from Happy Gilmore)
A great exchange of ideas, but were we done? Ha! After mentioning it to Father Beer Love our brains just kept on going and the fun was just getting started. We came up with a few other movie quotes:
- I’ll Have the Cream of Sum Yung Guy Rice Lager (from Wayne’s World)
- A Man’s Got to Know His Limitations Quadrupel (from Magnum Force)
- The Strain Was More Than he Could Bear Triple Stout (from Tombstone)
And Father Beer Love came up with a nice non-movie quote:
- Madam, You Are Ugly. In the Morning, I Shall be Sober London Porter (from Winston Churchill)
So let’s keep it going – let’s come up with some more quotes, both movie quotes and non movie quotes, that have an appropriate beer tied to them. Here’s a full list of beer styles (via Beer Advocate). Let’s have your best quotes – just post a comment below. Also – the gang at MNB is actually asking for help in naming their Belgian wit beer – if you want a real exercise in naming. If you want a fake one post away below.
Say Hello to My Little Saison
No meaning yes? black and tan (Clue)
I’ll pray I never need to call you non-alcoholic (Lost Boys)
All right, all right, all right Tripel (Dazed and Confused)
It’s what’s called a male pornographic fantasy Wild Ale
It’s what everybody in this car needs is some good ol’ worthwhile visceral experience Lager
If I woke up tomorrow with my head sewn to the carpet, I wouldn’t be more surprised than I am now Strong Lager
Just remember, it’s not a lie if you believe it non-alcoholic
May the Schwarz Be With You Schwarzbier
What’s a little boy like you doing with big boy smut like this English Bitter
Girls will go sterile just looking at you Belgian Dark Ale
Come and see the violence inherent in the Doppelbock
I’m coming and hell’s coming with me Trippel (Tombstone)
Howdy Parson, welcome to hell Quadruple (Paint Your Wagon)
We ain’t seen bad yet, but it’s coming Doppelbock (Next of Kin)
All the bowling alleys had been wrecked, so I spent most of my time looking for smoked beer. (Strange Brew) This movie could spawn hundreds of names….
You may take our lives, buy you’ll never take OUR SCOTTISH ALE! (sic-Braveheart)
When someone asks you if you’re a pale ale, you say, “YES!” (Ghostbusters)
All right, ramblers, let’s get Brown Ale (Reservoir Dogs)
I love the smell of Malt Liquor in the morning.
We don’t need no stinking badges Cerveza (Blazing Saddles)
Just for that I ought to give you a set of Oatmeal Stout. (Weird Science)
The fans have started chanting something here…it sounds like Irish Red Ale (Rudy)
I sense something, a presence I’ve not felt since…Pilsner.
This is Rye Beer, he’s a friend of mine. (Donnie Brasco)
And the companion beer to Rye Beer – Altbier, he’s a friend of ours. (Also Donnie Brasco)
I think I was trying to suggest something about the duality of Dubbel. (FMJ)
I’m your huckleberry Lambic (Tombstone)
This is pure snow! Do you know what the street value of this Winter Warmer is? (Better Off Dead)
First rule of government spending dubbel (contact)
Shitter’s full Stout (from Christmas Vacation)